Ridiculous Age Restrictions.

One thing that perturbs me to no end are stupid age restrictions. The reason I am blogging about this now is that the other day, we stopped at a McDonald's in Fairfield. It was a well-kept McDonald's and seemed pretty welcoming. However, there were two things that got me pretty upset. The first was that their PlayPen was off limits to anyone over the age of 12. I am 19, meaning that I was prohibited from entering said Playpen. This was disheartening, but the next issue at hand really got me upset. Since I was not ordering any food, I was just checking out the menu and my eyes came to a screeching halt on a frightening sight. In fine print under the Happy Meal menu read this blasphemy, "Toys Only Included for Children 10 & Under." Thats some bull right there. I don't know what 11 year olds did to piss off McDonald's so much to not make the cut, but I imagine it to be something nasty. It just doesn't make sense to me. What difference does it make if I am an 8 year old with a free Rugrats toy or a 36 year old with a free Rugrats toy? The answer is zero. So this got me thinking about other stupid age limits in life. Here's a doozie. You are trying out a new restaurant, you look at the menu, you don't see anything that is really in your price range until you reach the very bottom of the back page. There you see something that sounds delicious and recession friendly. One problem, under said section reads this, "For Children 12 & Under Only." Fuck that. If I want Dino-Shaped-Chicken-Nuggets (try and pretend you don't love the gratuitous and grammatically incorrect hyphens) I should get them. No matter if I am 3 years old or 57 years old. Maybe I am a paleontologist who happens to love chicken nuggets? What better food could there be in that situation than Dino-Nuggets? There are some stupid things that have gone on in the world since its inception in 1312 A.D. From religious intolerance, to racial discrimination, to the fact that Keanu Reeves still can land lead roles in films, we need to get rid of dumb things. Stupid age restrictions should be the first to go. Followed by Keanu, we've waited this long for prejudice to subside, a few more years can't hurt. Plus, The Lake House REALLY, REALLY SUCKED.

Funny The Way It Is.

Last night, a few of my suite mates and myself took part in a social drinking game. It took an hour to complete the game so we were talking throughout. The talk got political but remained calm. Everyone talked about who they supported in the past few elections. An argument or two surfaced but, nobody really raised their voice. Until the conversation switched topics. At dinner the same night, four of us were discussing what foods were "party foods." I mentioned lasagna, while another mentioned baked ziti. The line was drawn. When the conversation switched from politics to party foods, things got heated. People were screaming at each other, calling the other's family parties fake and boring. We were calling friends from home, other kids at school, and even pizzerias. The argument was not really going anywhere but everyone dug themselves in and would not waver on their views. Finally when everyone went to bed things began to calm down and nobody got hurt.

The point is, we talked about politics for approximately 10 minutes, while we talked about what food we see at family parties more often for about 50 minutes. We also backed up the latter argument with facts and surveyed other people. While the political conversation barely could be called a conversation at all. We just talked about how cool it would be to hang out with George W. Bush.

Typical Katie.

"Typical Katie" is a metaphor for that one girl who goes out to a party or a bar and doesn't fare too well in a battle with alcohol. She is the one who by the end of the night is either sleeping with the porcelain princess, still drinking, face down on a fairway, or getting her stomach pumped. Every time a group of girls go out to a party, it seems like Typical Katie is just waiting to come out.

You can easily point Typical Katie out. During a pre-game session, Ty-Kat (an acronym for Typical Katie) is the one pounding shots at a feverish pace. At this point it would be wise to slow Typical Katie down a little bit. Typical Katie, already drunk, refuses to slow down and you know this is going to be a long night. When the group finally makes it out, lets say this time its the bar, Ty-Kat stumbles into the bar, emphatically greets everyone she knows at the bar and then orders a Cranberry & Vodka. This is when her girlfriends try to slow her down as much as they can. They try to keep her away from the bar but, Typical Katie is usually a pretty elusive person and winds up with a fresh drink pretty regularly. As the night drags on, Ty-Kat seems to be having an exceptionally good time, she is dancing, singing, yelling, getting into pictures, the whole nine. But then it happens. Typical Katie orders that last drink of her night. You see her fun night turn into a nightmare in an instant. As you watch her head bob up and down at the bar with a miserable look on her face, you know its only a matter of seconds before T.K. (yet another acronym) is down for the count. You swoop in and tell Typical Katie it is time to go, and she is belligerent. She fights you off and tells you she is fine and just needs some air. You retort, "No Typical Katie, you need to go to bed." So you get your friends and tell them its time to go. They reluctantly comply and the fun part of the night is now over. Back at Ty-Kat's place, she is belligerent still. She may swing at you, yell at you, curse at you, or even throw up on you. But you weather the storm and wrestle Typical Katie to bed. You breathe a sigh of relief and call it a night.

Just a typical night, for Typical Katie.